Things you maybe knew about being a mom but were afraid to ask!s

This came through today from AlphaMom.
Hello.
Right on target.  Love the one about the puke.  Especially as my oldest is puking as we speak...=(
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by Chris Jordan

Nothing really prepares you for becoming a mother. Sure, people tell you what to expect, but until you actually have a kid or two, their words mean nothing. Needles in your spine? Dignity lost on the delivery table? You think after hearing everyone’s labor delivery nightmare stories that nothing else will shock you.
The only thing that prepares you for motherhood is becoming a mother.  And then you can have your own shocking realizations.
1: Loneliness.  Motherhood is very isolating.  Even when I had several kids I described my life as being lonely in a crowd.  Now that my kids are older I  have moved past this stage, but I still think it is one of those things mothers don’t talk about much.  Somehow it is taboo to admit that your baby doesn’t fulfill  every last desire that you have.
2: Your body will never be the same.  I’m not sure why this one shocked me so much.

Click here to read the rest.

Safety Q&A with Gavin DeBecker

I've heard his name a dozen times. Mostly with regards to celebrities and stalkers, especially Tom Cruise.

But a few months ago, Mr. P brought home an excerpt about intuition and looking for danger signs from this book. I was hooked.

Not that I have stalkers or anything, but why can't I be as informed about my personal safety as say, Cameron Diaz?

Macaroni Kid, a local kids' activity newsletter, had a Q&A session with DeBecker and I am so interested in reading his other books now. Especially because I had a heated debate with my father and 3 younger brothers tonight about why I was upset that Curly saw a preview for the new Tom Cruise/Cameron Diaz thriller. A preview with guns. And explosions. And blood.

Why should I have to explain a decision I'm making NOT to expose my kid to violence?
Maybe that explains why my brother left the birthday gathering early to hang out with his friends and why the others were on their iphones most of the time that my kids and I were there. No values for what's important in life - family. Rather than edge-of-your-seat action that makes you numb to all other feelings.

Pay special attention the part about sleepovers. Brilliant.

Enjoy!

"The beauty of sharing our history is that our children can learn the easy way what we learned the hard way."

Wow. For more inspiration, chcek out yet another great post on Zen Family Habits. I love #2 the most. If my kids only knew what went on in my head all day long...uh-oh!

Family Happiness - can it be achieved?

Here's a great reminder of what's important and how to really live like you mean it. Zen Family Habits A reminder to get off the computer during daylight hours =)

Car Seat Safety - never too careful!

I'm seriously thinking about being certified. Here's your reminder about what you can do to ensure your precious cargo stays where they should =)

Tell Nickelodeon to stop promoting violent games on their websites

For all the details and a link to fill out the form, click here. I've been getting emails from Campaign for a Commercial Free Childhood for awhile now and they're informative and helpful. No worry re: spam.
=)

Are You Raising A Narcissist?

Great article from Michelle (Scribbit) to remind us that "A Star is Born" shouldn't be our kids' first thought.
Ok, so I'm 100% guilty of the photomania. Must. Stop. Now.

Justice-Minded Children

Sunday was the big par-tay for the boys! Lots of fun. More to come on that later. As we gathered in the living room last night to open presents, I talked to Curly and Spike about our ritual of selecting a few (or more) toys or games that they would like to donate to someone or someplace that doesn't have the chance to enjoy as many toys as they do. In other words - give it to someone less fortunate before you open all the other stuff that you are damn lucky to have.

Curly seemed to get the idea. Until he suggested giving his firetruck to his friend, Alden, because Alden didn't have one. Love Alden. Know that he could have one if he wanted to, but he's not the kind of "someone" I was thinking of.

Mr. P and I pondered what we could do to help the boys, at their respective ages, see how they world is full of injustice and how they could play a part in righting some wrongs and making a difference.

Today I came across this post about how to raise justice-minded children. Thought you might like the read too.

It's a thought...National TV Turnoff Week 2010

Start with just one night =)
My kids think that tv is for UCLA sports and nothing else!
For links and stats that make you sad, click here

Get outside people!

Entrance fees will be waived at all 392 national parks April 17-25 for National Park Week.
Details

Interesting article about mothers' influence on daughter's eating habits

Quick but important read here

"Food is never just food. Food is love. Food is solace. It is politics. It is religion. And if that’s not enough to heap on your dinner plate each night, food is also, especially for mothers, the instant-read measure of our parenting. We are not only what we eat, we are what we feed our children. So here in Berkeley — where a preoccupation with locally grown, organic, sustainable agriculture is presumed — the mom who strolls the farmers’ markets can feel superior to the one who buys pesticide-free produce trucked in from Mexico, who can, in turn, lord it over the one who stoops to conventionally grown carrots (though the folks who grow their own trump us all). Let it slip that you took the kids to McDonald’s, and watch how fast those play dates dry up. "

Orange you glad you eat well?!

Ever since starting the CSA, I've had a new interest in making dinner. My mom worked full-time and still had the energy to put a four-course meal on the table every night. I loved eating her pasta sugu, her porkchops, stuffed artichokes and especially Breakfast-for-Dinner! I hated that she wouldn't let me drink my glass of milk until I was all finished with it, but I loved the majority of what she made. Except beef stroganoff. Yuck.

When I moved into an apartment with roommates in college, we set up a system where we each cooked for the 4 of us one week-night and didn't have to worry about anything but eating the other 3 nights of the week. Sweet!

Sour. Well, sheepishly sweet for me, but probably still sour for them. Their moms all stayed home with them while they were young and, for the most part, cooked from scratch. So did mine, but she still had a realistic relationship with Hamburger Helper.

(Our "Orange" meal from last week. We hit all the food groups - even had an orange jelly bean to show how little sweets we "need."

So one of my first presentations for my dinner debut was just that. Cheeseburger Macaroni. To this day, they tease me about how, um, healthy, and happy that meal was. I think 2 of them had never heard of Hamburger Helper. Or Pop Tarts.

For my birthday that year, they presented me with a hand-made cookbook with all their recipes written out on cards along with memorable quotes of our year together. I treasure that book. For the memories it brings, but also for the dinner ideas and simple ways to make something special for your family. Recipes calling for 5-7 ingredients and not a little time. I've added my favorites from my mom as well as a few from my mother-in-law and some close friends.

When I started cooking for Mr. P, I was so excited to use some of these recipes. He ate them. He also started insisting on cooking more and serving less. I didn't get his new obsessions with portion controls. And who doesn't want applesauce and a starch with their meal? My mom was an expert at providing a healthy-balanced dinner so I assumed I had to do the same. How dare Mr. P risk his health and my ego but refusing his carbs?

When I got pregnant with our first son, he started eating less of what I made, I started throwing up more of what I made and my cooking days were numbered. Mr. P gladly took over (for various reasons) and I let him. Happily. I'm embarrassingly admitting that up until last year, I probably cooked once or twice a month for almost 3 years...toddlers don't require "cooking" and most of my vegetables were frozen from Trader Joe's. Not unhealthy.

Enter the preschooler, the husband who isn't available to cook and time. Well, I don't have more time, just more motivation. I have two real eaters in the house now, besides myself and $15 a week going towards the most deliciously fresh picked vegetables in Orange County.

Even I am blown away by all that I've conquered in the past 3 months - kale, bok choy, swiss chard. The list goes on and on. So does my receipt from Trader Joe's where I do 99% of our shopping now. I cook with fresh ingredients, often using a "starter" from TJ's (whole grain mix, turkey meatballs, etc.) Lunch is rarely PB and J and can even be handfuls of samplings from each food group.

We've been talking every day about the 5 food groups and "eating a rainbow" each day. Something that I have taught first graders for over a decade but didn't take to heart until I was teaching it to and feeding it to my own precious boys. When the CSA box comes each week, I let them sit on the kitchen counter and help me sort, wash and chop up the "vegetibles" as Curly calls them. We've been to the farm twice, most recently for a strawberry tour. This past week, Curly asked me if we were adding "green onions" to our lunch as he pulled them out of the fridge! Green onions! My kid knows what a green onion is! Jamie Oliver would be proud! (Love that show, by the way. SO inspiring).

I also put handouts in a clear, plastic sleeve and we cross them off with a dry-erase marker each night. This one from MyPyramid.gov will personalize it based upon your child's weight, height and age. Brilliant. Here's another one.

The boys are benefitting and so am I. Healthier eating and a healthier relationship with food for a healthier LONG life.

Won't their roommates LOVE me? =)

Quick read - Don't get mad, get enlightened.

Here's a great article shared by my red-headed, never-blows-her-top parenting idol.

Parenting Fail

Last night Curly yelled at me because I wouldn't give him any more food after he went to bed. When I finally pulled him out of the bedroom (after 1 1/2 hours of trying to get him to sleep) and gave him ONE sausage link, he told me that he didn't like me.

Scratch that, he YELLED that he didn't like me.

This afternoon he commented on a character in the book "Llama Llama Mad at Mama" who was being mean to his mama - "That's not good. I would never be mean to my mama."

I'm lucky he still loves me enough to forget starving =)

The Case for Make Believe: An excellent review over at SimpleKids

As a first grade teacher, my favorite gift for birthdays and holidays is a good, engaging, can't-put-it-down book. Not just for the first read-through and its value, but also for the re-enactments and sequels that young children use their hard-earned imagination for. Megan over at SimpleKids posted a wonderful review of a great book about the value of Make Believe. Check it out here.

"Think It Through With Me" Thursday

Ok...here's one I need help on this week:

A grandparent spanked my oldest last week while we were staying in said grandparent's home. Curly was disobeying my direction to get dressed and ran into the living room. Grandparent went in to get him, Curly got upset and apparently hit his grandparent in the face.

I heard the commotion and asked what happened when they walked back down the hall. Grandparent responded with "He's fine" and no more detail. Curly told me what happened right then and I explained to the grandparent that I would attend to the fact that Curly hit but that it was NOT Ok for Grandparent to spank my son.

I was shaken and really upset afterward. I felt awkward spending the last two days of our vacation there. I told Mr. P who agreed with me on all accounts. Grandparent has advised us before to use spanking more often as a discipline strategy, but Mr. P and I both agree that we're really not ok with it.

Should I address the situation again? Thoughts?


Anything you want help thinking through? Post and let us know..we'll try to be of service =)

Curl up with a good book and your best boy!

As a teacher for almost 13 years, I'm more than happy to get up on a soap box and preach about the importance of reading and modeling a passion for reading. Mr. and I started reading to Curly the first night in the hospital. I find such joy in overhearing Curly read to his bear, his brothers and himself. We have book baskets in every room of the house - paperbacks, hardbacks, board books, flip books, magazines. The boys even see me flipping through the Pottery Barn catalog in the bathoom (the only time I have to do so =)

My dad taught me to read when I was 4 using Little House on the Prairie books. Since I don't really remember, I take his word for it =) But what I DO remember is the feeling of comfort and encouragement I felt when we would have that special time together at night. I wanted him to hear me read, wanted to hear him do the character voices and wanted to fall asleep dreaming about myself in the action of the story.

Throughout my training as an educator and literacy specialist, I've paid special attention to the discussions about reading and boys. Fittingly, I have 3 future male readers of my own.

Here are some recent blogs and posts I've come across that you might be interested in too, sons or daughters:

Guys Read - a web-based literacy program for boys

Books for Boys

Big Guys Books - stunning photography and graphics

Education.com

Daddy's Heroes - a fun book for dads to share with their kiddos - I got his for my niece for Christmas. My brother LOVED it.

Starfall - an online learning game site - FREE and fabulous!

Reading Rewards

I've also shared my website from last year's class (updated mid-decision to take this year off, so please forgive its "crumbs.") I wanted the parents of my students to have everything they needed at their fingertips to support their child in all academic areas. I put a lot of time into the links page so please take a LONG look there =)

Have fun READING. Remember...it's not the quantity, it's not the book, it's the READING that matters.

We're not in the clear just yet!

Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water...

This OLD (read 2006, which is practically ancient in parenting-time) article from BabyCenter came across my desk today. I read it and sheepishly remembered breakfast time this morning when...my 3 1/2 year old climbed on the counter today to get his own cup.

My husband asked if this was permitted now and before I could respond with a standard "No!" I thought for more than 2 seconds and realized that, yes, I had let my guard down and was allowing him to climb up there under the agreement that he'd not lean over the silverware drawer and that he would yell "Head" each time he opened and closed a cabinet. He is 3 and I do have two other boys occupying my hands...what harm is it to let him do a little indoor exercise?

If you had told me 3 years ago that this would be occurring in my home, I would have argued with you until I was blue in the face. What kind of a mother would that make me?

So for all of us who are only human...here's a gentle reminder. Eat it up. Of course, I'm the mother who puts the baby's swing on the dining room table while I'm folding clothes and lets the toddler walk around with a box on his head...





Childproofing around the house
Reviewed by the BabyCenter Medical Advisory Board
Last updated: August 2006

Highlights

Safe and sound
Gadgets galore
Scope out the territory
Protect outlets
Use caution with furniture and fixtures
Install gates
Check ties on blinds and curtains
Secure your windows and doors
Prevent poisoning
Prevent drowning
Prevent fires
Prepare for an emergency

Safe and sound

Parents worry endlessly about how to protect their children from stranger abduction and violence, but many overlook one of the biggest threats to their children's safety and well-being — their own home. Experts say that children between the ages of 1 and 4 are more likely to be killed by fire, burns, drowning, choking, poisoning, or falls than by a stranger's violence.

About 2.5 million children are injured or killed each year by dangers right in their own home, according to the Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC). That's why it's so important to carefully childproof your home.

Because childproofing and other safety measures can seem overwhelming, we've created three checklists that let you see at a glance what to do before your baby arrives, before your baby crawls, and before your baby starts toddling and climbing. You'll also find safety tips in our articles about childproofing your nursery, kitchen, and bathroom.

Here are some additional recommendations — along with some revealing statistics — about what you need to do to keep your preschooler safe at home.

Gadgets galore

You'll find all kinds of gadgets for sale that can really help your home childproofing efforts. Or, if you can afford it, you can hire a professional childproofer to choose and install safety devices for you. But keep in mind: Gadgets are no substitute for your eyes and ears.

"The best device is still supervision. I'd rather not recommend a product than suggest one that gives parents a false sense of security," says Anne Altman, a childproofing consultant and contractor in Santa Rosa, California.

Scope out the territory

The most effective way to ensure your preschooler's safety is to take a child's-eye view of your home. Get down on your hands and knees and see how things look from down there.

What's within reach? What looks tempting? Where would you go if you could crawl, toddle, or walk? This will help you figure out which cupboards, drawers, and other spaces your child might get into. As he starts walking and climbing, you'll have to reevaluate again, looking higher each time.

Carefully lock up or stow away every potential poison or other hazard, including cleaning products, medicines, vitamins, and knives. Another option is to use gates to limit your child's access to areas of your home that might contain dangerous items.

Keep an eye out for any tiny objects that your preschooler could choke on. Pick up any coins, marbles, beads, paper clips, and other small objects that you find on low tables or the floor or in low drawers or cupboards.

Be watchful when you have visitors, too. No matter how carefully you've childproofed the house, Great-Aunt Jane probably hasn't applied your standards to her purse. Aspirin, lipstick, and other items that people typically carry with them are dangerous to small children.

Protect outlets

It's a good idea to protect electrical outlets with outlet covers. However, the removable little plug-in caps can easily end up in your child's mouth. Instead, replace the outlet cover itself — at least those that are accessible — with one that includes a sliding safety latch. If you're using any extension cords in your home, you should insulate the junction points with electrical tape.

You'll have to reevaluate these precautionary measures as your child grows. "Remember," says Altman, "childproofing is an ongoing process: The gate you put at the top of the stairs for your 1-year-old may become his favorite climbing structure when he's 2."

Use caution with furniture and fixtures

According to the CPSC, at least 5,000 children under the age of 10 go to the emergency room each year with injuries caused when television sets, bookcases, and other furniture and appliances have tipped over on them. About six people die from furniture tip-overs every year, most of them children under the age of 5.

Large or heavy bookcases, dressers, and appliances are real hazards: Bolt whatever you can to the wall. Push items like televisions back from the edge of the furniture they're on or move them out of reach, and then secure them, too. Always put heavier items on bottom shelves and in bottom drawers to make furniture less top-heavy.

Babies start pulling up on furniture shortly after they start crawling. And when they learn how to climb, watch out! Some kids scale counters, bookcases, and anything else they can grab hold of. Take care to place floor lamps behind other furniture so that their bases are out of your child's reach.

Be sure to keep dresser drawers closed when you're not using them — they make perfect ladders. And be particularly careful to fully close file cabinet drawers, since pulling out one drawer could cause the cabinet to fall over.

Furniture corners are another common hazard, especially those found on coffee tables. Cover all sharp corners and hearth edges with bumpers to soften the impact if your child falls.

Install gates

Most parents consider safety gates essential childproofing tools. They allow you to open outside doors for air while keeping your child indoors, they contain him within a designated room, and they block his access to dangerous stairways and forbidden rooms, such as the bathroom or kitchen.

Unfortunately, if out-of-date or used improperly, safety gates can themselves pose a hazard to children. In general, look for gates your child can't dislodge but that you can easily open and close. (Otherwise, you'll be too tempted to leave them open when you're in a hurry.) For the top of the stairs, install a gate that screws to the wall rather than one that stays put by using pressure — it's much more secure.

It's best to buy brand-new safety gates, making sure they display a seal from the Juvenile Products Manufacturers Association (JPMA). Choose a gate with a straight-slat design rather than an older accordion-style gate with V-shaped openings, says Altman. "They can pose an entrapment and strangulation hazard."

Check ties on blinds and curtains

According to the CPSC, the cords on window coverings are a frequent cause of strangulation of children under 5. The younger victims, usually between 10 and 15 months of age, are typically in cribs placed near windows with pull cords.

Window blinds pose a particular hazard because a baby's neck could become trapped in the cords that raise the blinds or run through the slats. A child can become entangled in a looped window cord and strangle in a matter of minutes.

If the crib must be near a window, either cut off the pull cords or use cord shorteners or wind-ups to keep them out of reach. You can also replace a cord loop with a safety tassle. Window blinds sold since November 2000 have attachments on the pull cords to prevent a loop from forming between the slats.

If you bought your blinds before November 2000, visit the Window Covering Safety Council's Web site or call (800) 506-4636 to order a free repair kit.

Secure your windows and doors

According to the CPSC, every year thousands of children in the United States die or are injured in falls from windows. Most of the children injured or killed are under the age of 5.

Always open double-hung windows from the top or fit them with locks to prevent small children from opening them. Low windows shouldn't open more than 4 inches. Window stops are available that can prevent windows from opening more than this. Some newer windows come with window stops already installed.

Window screens alone aren't strong enough to prevent falls. You might consider installing window guards, which screw into the side of a window frame, have bars no more than 4 inches apart, and can be adjusted to fit windows of many different sizes.

According to industry standards announced by the CPSC in June 2000, the guards must fit snugly but not so securely that an older child or adult cannot remove them in case of an emergency. (The CPSC considers non-removable window guards safe for windows on the seventh floor and above.) Keep furniture away from windows to prevent children from climbing up and reaching the windowsill.

Use door stops or door holders on doors and door hinges to prevent injuries to hands. Children are prone to getting their small fingers and hands pinched or crushed in closing doors.

Prevent poisoning

According to the CPSC, more than 1 million possible poisonings of children under age 5 are reported and an average of 30 children die from poisoning each year.

Be prepared. Keep the number for the national poison control center — (800) 222-1222 in the United States — and your local emergency numbers close to every phone.

Store poisonous products out of your child's reach. Put safety locks on all cabinets and drawers that hold bug sprays, cleaning products, medications, and other potential poisons. Remember that even some houseplants can be harmful if ingested.

Dispose of old or outdated medications. But don't flush them down the toilet or pour them down the drain, as they could contaminate the water supply. If you live in the United States, ask your local waste disposal agency whether there's a program in place for safely getting rid of them. You can also ask whether your pharmacy will take back expired medication. If these options aren't available, you'll have to throw the drugs away in the trash — but first be sure to secure them so your little one can't get to them.

Watch out for hidden poisons. Not all poisons are easy to spot. Carbon monoxide is an odorless and colorless gas produced by malfunctioning fuel-burning appliances such as furnaces, water heaters, ovens, stoves, gas dryers, and emergency generators. Although you can't see it, smell it, or taste it, carbon monoxide gas can be deadly.

To protect your family, install a carbon monoxide detector in every sleeping area in your home, including the nursery. Check the batteries every spring and fall when you change your clocks. If the alarm goes off, leave your home immediately and call 911 or the local emergency number.

Look out for lead. If you live in a building constructed before 1978, it may contain lead paint. Lead paint is especially dangerous to your child if it's flaking or peeling. Lead can also be found in tap water from older pipes that are lined or soldered with lead. Breathing lead dust or fumes or swallowing anything with lead in it can give a child lead poisoning, which can cause learning disabilities, kidney disease, brain damage, growth delay, and other problems.

If there's exposed or deteriorating lead paint in your home, have a licensed professional either remove it completely or cover it with an approved sealant. Until the lead can be removed, wash your child's hands and face, as well as his toys, often to reduce his exposure to lead-contaminated dust. For information on how to get a paint sample analyzed, visit the National Lead Information Center Web site or call (800) 424-5323.

Prevent drowning

According to the CPSC, about 115 children under age 5 drown each year — not in a pool, but in their own home.

Tubs, toilets, and even buckets of water are all potential dangers. That's why it's important to practice water safety at home.

Most in-home drowning deaths occur in bathtubs. Never leave your child unattended in the tub — even if he's in a ring or bath seat. In fact, supervise your child whenever he's in the bathroom, and install a safety latch on your toilet lid to prevent him from accidentally falling in. For more helpful hints, see childproofing your bathroom.

Infants and toddlers can drown in as little as an inch of water, according to the CPSC. This seemingly unlikely scenario happens because young children are top-heavy. If they lose their balance (as they often do) while peering into a toilet or bucket, they can fall in headfirst and get stuck.

Never leave a bucket of water or other liquid unattended. If you're using a bucket of water for mopping or cleaning, pour out the water as soon as you're finished.

Finally, take great care around pools and hot tubs. If you have a wading pool, drain it and store it upright after each use. If you have a permanent pool, enclose it with a fence that's at least 4 feet high, and lock the gate leading to the pool after each use. Always secure the cover on your spa or hot tub.

Prevent fires

Nearly 2,500 children were injured or killed in residential fires in 2002, and more than half of those children were under the age of 5, according to the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA).

Experts say that a working smoke alarm can cut in half the chances of dying in a fire. Install smoke alarms in every room of the house. Check them monthly to be sure they're working, and change the batteries every year. Consider installing smoke alarms that use long-life (10-year) batteries.

If you have a fireplace, keep a fire extinguisher nearby, and have it serviced or checked according to the manufacturer's instructions.

Start talking to your child about the dangers of fire. Make an evacuation plan and practice your fire escape route regularly.

Do you hate the feel of flame-retardant sleepwear? Softer, non-flame-retardant garments can be okay under certain conditions. See our article Childproofing Your Nursery for details.

Prepare for an emergency

Program emergency numbers into your home and cell phone. Keep a list of these numbers close to each phone in your home and give the list to all caregivers. Have on hand the local poison control number, or the number for the national poison control center, (800) 222-1222 in the United States, which will immediately put you in contact with the closest center.

Stock up on first-aid supplies. Make sure babysitters and other caregivers know where to find these supplies in your home and how to respond in an emergency.

We Are Family

I've been thinking a lot these past 21 days about what I want for my family this year. Things we should accomplish, things we could accomplish and the things that will hold us back from both.

One of my goals as I reevaluate our finances, our time commitments, our relationships, etc. is to make more from less. More memories and love from less obligation and pressure.

I came across Slow Family Living. The meeting of two women with child development and family life background combined with science.

We are offering a way of thinking about, seeing and implementing family life. We provide the science, the practicals and the lens for understanding, believing and appreciating the richness of building and maintaining lifelong family connections. We want people to see that family life can be the well where members can go to fill up and to have fun. We offer tools, support and inspiration that guide people in slowing down, connecting and enjoying life as individuals and within the family. - SlowFamilyLiving.com

It originated in Austin, no surprise. Can't you just see these Texan women with their red leather cowboy boots perched up on the porchrail enjoying a cup of sweet tea and slow-drawling about how easy it was to get their kids to fall asleep last night to the light of the big Texan moon? Eat that up.

Since I live on the West Coast, I'm not able to attend one of their interesting workshops, but they do have materials for purchase as well as some wonderful starters to get you on your way to a simpler, more quality - less quantity way of being a family unit.

From their website:

Why do a Family Mission Statement?

• A mission will bring you to a clear understanding of how you want family life to unfold.
• It will serve as a reminder of who you are as a family.
• It allows you to live your family life with a vision of why you started a family in the first place and where you want it to go.
• It lets your children know that you are completely committed to them and to family life.
• It tells each member and the world, “This is how and why we exist as a family. We have a unique purpose for being together.”
• It helps all the members of the family see the family as an entity and not just as separate individuals sharing a household and each going their own way. As your children grow and start gaining independence it will be even more grounding for them and for the family as a whole if everyone has a clear vision of the family’s mission.
• It will give everyone the confidence to step out into the world with a strong sense of who they are and where they come from.
• A family mission statement helps build a sustainable bond between family members that can help foster a lifelong connection.
• It will serve as a reminder to each member of the family that you are all in the family — when you are together and when you are apart.

You’ll discover such things as…

How did we get here? What’s working? What’s not? Where did we come from? How do we see the future? How do we want family life to feel? Holiday rituals. Sibling relationships – both your own growing up and that of your children. What are the surprises of family life? Ways to celebrate being a family.

________________________________

I think Mr. and I will start out with writing a "P* Family Mission Statement." Since the bugaboos are so young, they'll have little in the way of input, but my hope is that we can re-evaluate this every January and fine-tune it until it represents the steady path we'd like to take.

What are the values and beliefs that you want to incorporate into YOUR family's mission statement? Do you think your spouse would agree on most of them?